Happy Birthday to Our Daughter

Today is our daughter's birthday. Happy Birthday daughter!!!

When I found out I was expecting you, I was so excited! Your dad and I lived in the time of the flower children. We lived in a little basement apartment that belonged to a big old home. It had a huge front porch and sat on top of a hill overlooking the college campus your dad went to. Every day I walked to work -- about 5-6 blocks one way. Your dad built you a crib made from bamboo - it was a beautiful little crib for our little girl. We did not have t.v., but we had music. Dinner was sometimes a bowl of Raisin Bran, but when I craved a strawberry pie, your dad would get up and go to the nearest supermarket to buy me one. I remember one time your dad bought me veal because it was suppose to be good for me -- yuck! I did not like it -- too strong of a taste. I did, however, love oysters and crackers (still do!)

I remember we made a couple of practice runs to the hospital to see how long it would take us. :-) Dad and I even went to the Lamaze classes to learn how to breathe correctly --we were going to have you naturally -- no drugs. The morning of the tenth, I got up to get ready for work as usual when my water broke --- "Hurry!!!! It's Time!!!"

Your dad got me in the car and we made it to the hospital with plenty of time. You know the "no drugs?" Forget it -- after almost the whole day in labor, I said, "OK, give me something for this pain!!!!" You were born at 6:06 p.m. You weighed 7 lbs., 8 oz. and you were 19 1/2 inches long. You had so much hair and oh my gosh -- we fell in love with you in an instant.

I woke up and saw you in your daddy's arms. Since then you have been daddy's girl and mine, too. We love you.

Thank you for giving blood for your "tia" on your birthday. God bless you, mija. We are so blessed to have you in our lives.

Happy Thanksgiving!

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! It's interesting to have a day like today when we are reminded of everything that we are thankful for, but more than that it is a day of good food and family togetherness. It's a good day to hear from friends and other family members, too.

We are blessed to have so much in our lives and we are thankful every day, not just today. But it's all good. :-)

Tomorrow is the beginning of the Christmas buying known as "Black Friday." What a somber name to call the beginning of this "rush." For years, my husband and I have been up early and off we go to join the throngs of people waiting in line to get into the stores in order to buy that one gift. Years ago, I stood in line when the "Cabbage Patch" doll was the toy to have. A friend of mine was way up front and as the doors open we all rushed inside. She yelled to me, "G., CATCH!" I lifted my arms and caught that box -- DARN IT~ my daughter would have a Cabbage Patch doll!! Ahhhhh ... good to have a friend with a good throwing arm.

Most times, however, we get inside and the product we want is gone! Bummer! I really believe they buy only a small amount for each store. They just want to get us in and buy other stuff -- no sir-ee -- not us - we turn around and walk right out, get in our car --- and --- zoom to the next store.

I don't quite know our strategy for tomorrow. Last year, we got there when we got there. I think we will do the same tomorrow. Breakfast sounds good, too.

Again, we wish you all a Happy Thanksgiving, a good beginning of the Christmas season, good health, good times with family and friends.

Dad

Today was my father's birthday. He would have been 81 years old. I loved my father very much. He was strict when we were growing up, an authoritative father, but he was also fun to be around. We used to play baseball with him - with 8 or 9 children at one time, we had quite a baseball team. In the winter, he used to pull us on a sled tied to the back of his pickup truck over mounds of snow. It was so much fun. I remember Sunday mornings Spanish music playing as we woke up. I remember dancing with him. I remember him singing all the old "rancheras." I remember fishing and camping. After I got married, I remember his visits to our home for a cup of coffee. We would sit and talk for a long time. He would tell me all his stories of long ago when he was growing up and I began to understand him better. As he grew older, he became sick with diabetes and heart problems. He also changed from the strict disciplinarian to a kind, gentle soul. He loved his grandchildren and he loved us. The day he died, I told him I loved him. "Do you love me, too, Dad?" And he nodded "yes." "I'll be back soon, Dad." My sister called to tell me he had died in the half hour after I left him. I returned to hug him one more time and fix his hair. My dad.
I miss him. We all do. Happy Birthday, Dad. We love you.

A Crossroads

How many times have we've been here -- at a crossroads? Where do we go from here? What options do we have? Are we making the right decisions?

When I hear that "Parenthood does not come with a manual" I always think -- you are so right. It is not easy being a parent, but we've been here before and we know. Ahhhhh.... children.

It's only for a moment.

Have faith that we are leading you in the right direction because we've done it before. We are not rookies, we have seen too much of life already and with God's help we are steering you in the right direction. It's always been about you. . . always.

God bless us all today.

My Son

Where has all the time gone? It seems like yesterday that my children were small.Today I went to order the Senior photo packet for my youngest son. Next fall he, too, will go off to college and then what? It will be just me and their dad -- what to do? Oh my gosh, what am I talking about? I should be rejoicing in the fact that our youngest is almost there! One more year of high school.

My youngest is different from my other two. My oldest was a social butterfly--the Belle of the Ball, the hockey player, the actress, the Princess. My middle son was the jock, the football player, the politician who wrote many stories. And my youngest is a little of both, but much like his father. He is pensive, playful, talkative, and also a wonderful writer. He is so ready to be done with high school and move on with his life. "Change your attitude," I tell him. "Enjoy your last year -- make it fun." He responds, "Are we talking about the same high school?" And he laughs.Today I ordered his senior pictures -- pricey, yes, no doubt. But he is my last one and his picture needs to hang right next to his brother and sister's.

Honey, we've done good. God has blessed us.

Family

This is the area where I grew up. It is called the Hagerman Valley in southern Idaho. From what I hear Hagerman has grown by leaps and bounds. New people have moved in to replace or add to the old families that used to live there. When we were growing up, I don't think we thought beyond tomorrow. We lived for the day and had our good and bad times. My favorite thing to do beside going to school was fishing. Every year - I don't remember what season - we would wake up early with our fishing poles ready to go. We would go out to the lakes along with many of the local and visiting fishermen (and women) to cast our poles at the designated time. It was so much fun! As soon as we caught our limit (there was quite a few of us) we would head home to cook our trout. Delicious!

Times have passed. Memories are good. We all went our separate ways. Two of us stayed in Idaho - the rest are scattered across the U.S. -- sometimes when I am at the store during a holiday, I hear people talk about who is coming over for dinner and everyone I listen to has family here -- we are too scattered.

BUT we love each other and do try to get together once in a great while. :-)

Now our children are growing up and making their own ways in the world. We celebrate their accomplishments which are many and share our sadness when there is a misfortune or poor choices made. I have heard that people say sometimes you have to hit rock bottom in order to see the errors of your way and I believe this. As parents, however, our hearts hurt when our children hurt.

Again we are here for each other.

Little Sister

Happy Birthday, little sister! I love you.

Let me tell you about my little sister. I am 2nd in line and she is 5th. There is a lot that I remember when we were growing up and a lot that I do not remember. I left home when she was still very young.

Now that we are older, she is my closest ally -- I can tell her anything in confidence and she in return. She grew up to be a tall, beautiful young woman. She dresses in styles of the fashion world. She is soft-spoken and kind. Her husband and sons love her and hold her in high regard. She is blessed. And I am happy for her life. I am proud of whom she has become.

Happy Birthday, little sister. :-)

Our Fun Vacation!

Last weekend, we went to Comic-Con in San Diego for the first time. I had no idea what to expect, but it was so much fun! The above picture was taken on our last night there. It's amazing how people can actually live on these boats with minimal possessions. I don't think I could do that -- I love my house :-).

Traveling down the escalator -- one of many.

Spiderman, Spiderman! (That's all I know of the song).

Cool shot of Arnie and Sarah Conners!

These girls were cool! I think a lot of these people in costume practice posing at home before the convention. I just tapped them on the shoulder and asked if I could take their picture and they turned around in unison with a ready pose. So cool! They love the Joker!

Good aim!

We had a blast! It's a huge convention and if you consider going next year, plan on being in shape, cause we sure got tired. I'm looking forward to next year. :-)

Rest . . .

The party is over . . . sigh of relief. It was a really nice party. Lots of family and friends. Good food and drinks. But it was a bit chilly. My little sis-in-law looked very happy, laughing and dancing. I'm so glad she was able to have her party here at our home.

Today I rested.

Tomorrow I start school again. I think I need 6 more units to move up to the next pay scale at work. I'm so excited and a bit anticipatory since I've never done an online class before. A friend at work is doing the same class with me so she'll be a big help to me. Wish me luck.

Baby is here

My nephew's baby was born, I think yesterday or was it this morning? Nonetheless, he has made his debut. His name is Aaron Jaden (don't know if I spelled that right). He was born in distress, he had swallowed his little poop and now has respiratory problems. He is in ICU -- poor baby... My sister-in-law, his grandma, is on her way to see him. She doesn't know if she will be able to see him, but I hope she can.

I know there's so much good medicines and technology to help the doctors that he will be fine. He has to be. He's just a baby.

Lots of prayers.

Malcolm

I'm sorry. We are all sorry. We feel your sadness.

My Very Special Sister

A Very Special Sister

For many years we've shared our lives
One roof we once lived under
Sometimes we laughed, sometimes we cried
Through winter storms and thunder
The younger years have faded fast
We've gone our separate ways
But through all time our friendship lasts
Our bond in life remains
As summer brings the happy times
The autumn winds will whisper
A closer friend I'd never find
Than the one I call my Sister.

When my sister and I were kids we used to run in the fields where my dad was working not far from our little home with the wood burning stove. We would watch the dark clouds as they began to roll over above us. We'd hear the thunder and pretended that God was playing with a bowling ball. We knew lightening would follow soon. We could see our little house off in the distance and start running, laughing and yelling to each other. Once the lightening started, we would "dive" into the small waterless ditches along the field. We'd lay there side by side watching the lightening spread it's amazing rays across the sky. We'd look at each other and smile. I was scared, but I knew as long as she was there with me, I was ok. Once the rain began to fall, we'd run toward the house, entering drenched in rain. I remember those days and I know that she does, too. I was 4 and she was 5.

My sister has cancer. What do I do now? She has a lot of faith, I need to have faith, too. She tells me to stay positive and I will -- for her. We have a fight ahead of us so that when this is over, we can smile and laugh again. I love my sister. God bless her.

Good-bye

Life left him last night. He was tired, his breathing labored. His spirit is free now to soar toward heaven and our good Lord who had been waiting for him. Good-bye, Compa, you were always good to us.

Love

What is the value of love? Can there be an amount put to that value? I don't think so because in the end -- there's nothing that can replace what was once there. Love is a feeling felt deep in your heart, in your mind, in your soul, in your whole being. Material things will never compensate for the person you miss. True you can smell a scent left on a jacket for as long as you can and remember when he used to wear it and how handsome he looked in it. You can remember the hugs, the kisses on the cheek, the smiles, the long chats about nothing and everything. But when they're gone it's too hard to understand. Where is that cup of coffee -- that piece of toast?

Life is leaving him and we will miss him very much. I lost my father so long ago and now we are losing another father again and I feel so sad. Pray for us all.

"Dear"

One day long ago, I wanted to come to San Bernardino to visit my husband (boyfriend back then). I lived in Riverside and took the bus. When I arrived, he wasn't waiting for me. I waited for a little while and began to worry. I did not know his mom or step-dad, but I had their phone number. I called and introduced myself and asked for my "boyfriend." His mom told me he had to work late and where was I? I told her I could wait for him -- I was at the bus stop. She said they would come for me. When they drove up I was taken aback by her beauty and grace. His step-dad was tall and strong -- and they were both so nice. They took me to their home and I remember how beautiful it was. A forest green rug with white couches. Gold-colored wall decorations, a huge mirror on one wall and a marbled dining table. I sat down quietly and she quickly invited me into the kitchen. There they were cooking together, talking, laughing. She called him "Dear." He called her "Dear," too. I was so quiet and shy, but I sincerely enjoyed watching them. They were so happy.

I cry and sadness overwhelms me to see him laying in that hospital bed. I want him to get up. I want to say "Hi, Compa!" But he's in a coma. Does he hear us? Is he waiting for us to let him go? Can we let him go? We pray for a miracle -- we want to prove the doctors wrong. "...Thy will be done . . . on earth as it is in heaven." It's so hard to let go.

Sadness

Sometimes when I hear a song - a beautiful song, melodic - I feel I can fly over the treetops free of worry and sadness. Then reality sets back in and I know this is but a glimpse of wonderment. My step father-in-law, our compadre, was in a serious car accident last night. We don't know if he will make it and we leave him in God's hands that the good doctors may minister to him with all their expertise. My sadness is for my daughter, his Godchild, and my mother-in-law.

My own father died maybe 12 years ago. I say maybe because it feels like last year or two years ago. He was sick for a long time. I remember going to see him at the hospital every day after work. We would take turns, my sister, mom and I. My turn was in the afternoon until dinner time and then I'd run home, make dinner, and run right back to stay with him in the evening hours. My mom and sister stayed with him all day and most of the late afternoon. This day, I read him a children's story book in Spanish "I"ll Love You Forever." It was about a mother who had a baby and she would rock him back and forth, back and forth - and she would tell him, "I'll love you forever." I changed the mother to a father for him. I asked him if he liked it and he gently nodded "yes." By this time he was so hooked up to so many machines and he was blind. It made me angry to see him this way. He was so unhappy. I told him I loved him and asked him if he loved me too. He nodded yes again. I told him I would be back later. Kissed him on the forehead and left with a heavy heart. It was going to be 4:00. For days now when I went to sleep, I could hear his heart beating. This day however when I laid down for a nap I dreamt he was floating. I woke up startled because I could not hear his heart anymore. The phone rang and it was my sister to tell he had passed away at 4:30. He had been alone. He had waited till I left and died before she got there. My sadness was great. I loved my father with all my heart.

And now we are at another crisis road in our lives. God willing my step father-in-law pulls through and I know he will have a long road of recovery ahead of him, but we will be there to help as I'm sure many people will be. All we can do is pray for him and our family. Perhaps listening to melodic music is good -- it helps ease the pain.

My Sister

I have a little sister who is my best friend. She is sweet and kind. She has a soft voice and thinks nice things about everybody. She is a blessing to me. And I love her so much.

We are years apart, but yet she understands me. When I am sad, she is sad with me. When I get excited, she gets excited, too.

I left home when she was still young, therefore, I did not get to see her through her teenage years. And for this I am sorry. I wish I had been there for her more. But that is in the past and I marvel at what she has accomplished in her life. Her husband is sweet - we love him. Her children are loving and courteous.

Today she called me -- she was concerned about the stress we were having at work because of the upheaval we recently had. I gave her the good news and she was happy for us. This is a sister -- A sister is love. Thank you, sister.

My Mom

Moms are great!

That day was fun. I enjoyed it. I realize that I have things in common with her. I drive like her--the slow lane on the freeway :-). We both like to browse at the stores -- we like to take our time. When we're together, I like when she talks Spanish with me -- this is my mom. I have the time now to spend with her and I don't want to waste it. I realize time goes along too fast and we don't know what tomorrow will bring. I need to make the most of it by calling her regularly and hopefully, God willing, get to see her more often.

My Mother

Today I went shopping with my mother. We had a great time just walking around and looking at every little thing. I tend to be a quicker shopper, but it was nice to slow down and enjoy the afternoon with her.

Life

Yesterday I began my first blog. I had to leave because my father-in-law was rushed to the hospital, but he is ok. My little sister-in-law, God bless her soul, had become worried because he had woken from a dream screaming and slurring his words. He is diabetic and we worry about him. Also he had been in a traffic accident not too long ago and I'm sure this has caused him lots of stress. He is ok now. The doctor thinks he didn't eat right and the stress. My sister-in-law diagnosed it just right. She should be the doctor.

It wasn't too hard to write all that. I used to write a lot in high school. I even got the award in English-Writing my Senior year which was quite an accomplishment for me seeing that Spanish is my first language. Through the years, tho, raising a family has taken precedence over anything else. My writing extends to a few e-mails to a favorite brother and best friend in New Mexico and that's it. Oh, also Christmas cards :-). I'll send Christmas cards.

I was raised to keep my thoughts to myself. Family business stayed as family business. So this should be quite an endeavor. I will write about the weather! Ha!

Tomorrow I go back to work after being on vacation for 6 weeks. It will be great to see my little ones. I teach 1st grade.